When Your Dream Job Disappoints You...

From the moment I entered nursing school, I knew I wanted to be nurse in the operating room.  That was it for me.  I got to go into the operating room during my first semester (and hold an appendix!) and I absolutely loved it, the operating room part, not necessary the holding of the appendix.

I starting apply for jobs in the hospital in February of this past year, and thought it was a huge sign that I received an interview for a Nurse Intern position in the OR.  I really felt that was where I was meant to be after the interview and even more so after they offered me the position to start in May.  I was ecstatic.  Operating Room here I come!

I started in May and my first few days were in a classroom setting learning about all things in the OR and sterility.  Fast forward to my first day at my hospital and unfortunately, I knew it was the wrong decision the moment the director of the unit introduced me to the staff.  I tried to pretend like it was going to be my thing, I mean, it was a Monday - Friday nursing job with no nights or weekends with the exception of call.  How awesome was that going to be for a new grad?

Alas, the hours could not shine this position up like a shiny new penny.  I tried to fight it for as long as I could, but I hated it.  I hated going to there every single day of my summer.  I was miserable.  With the exception of a few people in the OR and the surgeons (seriously, the surgeons where the nicest people in there), I have never met such rude and immature people in my entire life.  I felt like I was back in junior high again with some of the stuff that was going on.  One of the girls walked around and made the fart noise (you know the one that sixth grade boys make???) under her arm pit.

The same girl would tap her fingers on the sterile table as I would gown and glove myself.  You can imagine the look I shot her when I told her that was not going to make me move any faster.  The final straw for me was the day when another one of the girls started criticizing everything I was doing setting up my sterile field.  She was not doing it a "let me help simply for this for you way" she was doing it in a demeaning and condescending way and I lost my shit on her and walked out of the OR.

I knew that I would not be happy in the OR, but I had to come to terms with knowing I would end up working nights and weekends if I took a job on the floor.  Ultimately, I decided that I really did not like anything about the OR.  I hated scrubbing in on surgeries to stand in the same place for hours (including the time I held a man's ball sack scrotum for hours) and I hated positioning patients.  The only thing that I enjoyed was the part where I would go and get the patient and bring them back to the OR.  That is when I realized I really need to interacting with patients more.  That is why I am so grateful that I will be working in the ICU after graduation.

If you are still stuck on the teaser about the scrotum holding, do not fret, I am planning a post with many such stories from my time in the OR.  There is plenty of scrotum holding to go around.